Fear Not

Fear has been something I’ve always struggled with. I almost always go to the worst case scenario. As a mom that only increased. From the moment I found out I was pregnant with my firstborn, fear was part of my parenting style. This season in the world has been full of fear. It’s one of Satan’s most effective weapons. Believers and unbelievers alike fall prey to it. At the beginning of the chaos, I lived full of fear! I was downright crazy! I’m not proud of it. I liked the saying, “prepare for the worst, hope for the best.” I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad philosophy, but I was using it try and justify my fear. It’s smart and even Biblical to prepare for hard times, both physically and spiritually. Proverbs 6:6-8 says, “Take a lesson from the ants, you lazybones. Learn from their ways and become wise! Though they have no prince or governor or ruler to make them work, they labor hard all summer, gathering food for the winter.” (NLT) We see in Scripture times where the Lord warned of coming famine. What did the people do then? They prepared and stored up for the times when food would be scarce. There is wisdom in preparation.

Matthew 25:1-12 gives us this parable on being prepared, “Then the kingdom of heaven will be comparable to ten virgins, who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Five of them were foolish, and five were prudent. For when the foolish took their lamps, they took no oil with them, but the prudent took oil in flasks along with their lamps. Now while the bridegroom was delaying, they all got drowsy and began to sleep. But at midnight there was a shout, ‘Behold, the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.’ Then all those virgins rose and trimmed their lamps. The foolish said to the prudent, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ But the prudent answered, ‘No, there will not be enough for us and you too; go instead to the dealers and buy some for yourselves.’ And while they were going away to make the purchase, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding feast; and the door was shut. Later the other virgins also came, saying, ‘Lord, lord, open up for us.’ But he answered, ‘Truly I say to you, I do not know you.’” (NASB)

When fear sets, there are 3 ways we can react. I’m sure you’ve heard it before. You can freeze, flee or fight. I honestly think there is a time for each of these. I don’t think freezing in some scenarios makes you weak. Sometimes in dangerous moments, not moving can save your life. I don’t think fleeing some scenarios makes you a coward. Sometimes the best thing you can do is to walk (or run) away. In some scenarios, freezing or fleeing are wise decisions. I’ve had several conversations that could have developed into tell-all conversations, but in those moments I evaluated who I was talking to and either out of fear, or with wisdom, made the decision to freeze or flee and redirect the path the conversation was on. 

As for fighting, there are definitely scenarios where fighting is the wisest thing to do to push back the fear. This blog was started because Phil and I wanted to keep a record of our experiences. Fairly quickly we decided we also wanted to be able to share it to help people understand our reasoning and to share our research. Initially it may have been out of fear, but it turned into something we were preparing for. We are so grateful that we have this blog for that purpose, but we are also blown away and humbled that the Lord has used it to help others as well. It’s an honor to be used in this way!

At the beginning of this journey there was a lot of fear. Fear of being nude in front of others, fear of others finding out, fear of how this was really going to affect our family, and so much more. Over time though, that fear has turned into peace that what we are doing is not condemned by God, and our confidence in His goodness and blessings has grown immensely. This summer I was again struggling with the fear of being found out. At the Christian Naturist gathering I was speaking to one of the men about my fears and he showed me the “Nail to the Cross Prayer”. He walked me through it and it was one of the most spiritual moments of my life. If you are not familiar with it, here are the steps.

  1. Father, I bless my spirit to be prominent over my body and soul. 
  2. Father, I nail (thought, feeling, spirit, etc) to the Cross.
  3. Father, I break all agreements, known and unknown, that I have made with (thought, feeling, spirit, etc.) and I repent of joining with (thought, feeling, spirit, etc.).
  4. Father, I ask that you send (thought, feeling, spirit, etc.) away from me. 
  5. Father, what do you have to give me in place of (thought, feeling, spirit, etc.)?
  6. Listen to the Father to see what He has to give you to replace the thought, feeling, spirit, etc. 
  7. I seal (what the Father told me) in my spirit.

When I did this prayer I nailed fear to the cross and replaced it with joy. 

Here are some Scriptures that have helped me deal with fear. 

Psalm 34:4-5, “I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces. In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened; he saved me from all my troubles. For the angel of the Lord is a guard; he surrounds and defends all who fear him.” (NLT)

Psalm 46:1-3, “God is our refuge and strength, A very ready help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth shakes and the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; Though its waters roar and foam, Though the mountains quake at its swelling pride.” (NASB)

John 14:26-27, “But the Helper, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and remind you of all that I said to you. Peace I leave you, My peace I give you; not as the world gives, do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, nor fearful.” (NASB)

Isaiah 41:10, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

I have discovered that fear no longer has the hold on me that it did before. I always want what is best for my kids, but I’ve come to realize that I only have so much control over what happens to them. I can’t be with them 24/7, and honestly, even if I was, I’m still not going to be able to stop every bad or hard thing from happening to them. I always want to be able to control the narrative surrounding our journey in naturism, but I know that that too is out of our hands. The Lord is in charge of our lives and ultimately it is His will that will be done. I know that God wants good things for my kids, even when they have to go through hard things.

I know that God may use some hard things in our lives to bring about His plan. We’ve known several families who were confronted about naturism and went through very rough times in their lives because of it, but through their stories, I know that God used those times to bring blessing. We can worry and be afraid, or we can prepare and be ready for the roads the Lord will lead us down. When we are prepared for where the Lord wants to lead us and prepared for the attacks of Satan, we don’t have to fear them. In fact, it’s in some of those times that we get to experience an intimacy with the Lord that only comes through hard times and eventually the joy of the Lord. James 1:2-4 “Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.” (The Message)

1 Peter 3:15 says, “Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it.” (NLT)

The hope I have is found in Christ. It’s found in the love and sacrifice of giving His life for mine (and yours). It’s found in the miracle and majesty of an empty tomb. It’s found in the daily patience and forgiveness of a gracious Savior. It’s found in the hope and assurance of everlasting life when my time on earth is over. It’s found in the knowledge of Psalm 91:2-4, “Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him. For he will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease. He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.” (NLT)

47 thoughts on “Fear Not”

  3. b3rtj0n
    Reply

    Well said! Such an important message of finding our peace and security in Christ.

    So grateful that you share your journey, including your struggle with fear of what others may think. Your vulnerability and authenticity is a gift to us all. Please don’t stop sharing.

    My wife and I love being naked and we are looking for opportunities for public nudity. You encourage us to walk in faith by God’s grace.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Paul B
    Reply

    Thank you for this. I’m not naturist. . . yet. I’m a middle aged guy who struggled with pornography since I was a teen. My journey away from addiction is a long story, but not on topic. A recent internet search on what the Bible says about nudity challenged me. Particularly the fact that all the “nudity is sin” arguments seemed to be cherry picking scripture. There was a little of that from the Naturism perspective, but on the whole, the deep respect for scripture surprised me. It was there that I discovered My Chains are Gone, the Biblical Naturist and this Blog. Within 2 days, I was ignoring what would have been triggers.

    That’s where this article comes in. As I become more convinced of something that bucks against something I was taught to be “gospel” for want of a better word, I’m coming to a place where I must act. Otherwise I’m a hypocrite. But it’s not as easy as just ditching my clothes. My wife isn’t anti, so to speak, but far, far from on board. My adult son freak’s out if he sees anything through a not properly closed door. And in the state of Queensland, Australia, public nudity is considered wilful exposure, under the crimes act.

    But the biggest challenge is church. A number of years I felt God wanted me to call Christian men to godly manhood. I’ve been involved in, and facilitated programs to help men with porn addiction. I found they worked. . . for a short while. But then I discovered the truth. My very real fear is that if I discuss this with the men I feel I need to, I may be cut off from the possibility of proclaiming the truth. But I feel it’s a conversation I need to have.

    Liked by 2 people

    • b3rtj0n
      Reply

      Thanks for sharing this Paul. Always the way forward is to just share with a few others the journey you are on. Raise the question. The dogmatic approach many of us were raised with didn’t provide room for discussion, conversation, hearing each other’s story. When we have that chance, it helps bring the walls down. Opens us up to consider scripture and application more fully.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Paul B

        Toowoomba has an organisation called “A City Free from Porn.” They’ve got the council and a lot of businesses on board. If you are interested in statistics on porn use they are a good source. They promote an Australian course called Valiant Man, which follows the Every Man’s Battle kind of model. This is what I have been involved in. My current church has asked me to look into starting Valiant Man. Now I feel conflicted. All the stuff about men being wired to be turned on visually seemed so true at the time. Now, I think it’s based on a false premise. And many men will, like I did, find the relief from addiction only temporary. This is a conversation we need to have. But if it were accepted, it would shake the church. I’m not suggesting that the whole church should become naturist. Though I’d be cool with that. But we need to be free from the worship of clothing that is our culture’s norm. All I take from Genesis 3 is that God permitted us to wear clothing. Please pray for wisdom and opportunities to have meaningful conversations in this regard.

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      • Phil O.

        Thanks for sharing your story, Paul. I relate to so much of the same. The men’s ministries and conferences are all the same and all misguided, though well intentioned. I just want to scream this stuff, but it will not be accepted broadly and will have negative ramifications for my family. So I have to try to speak truth as I can without going full bore towards naturism. Though naturism is the full extent of redeemed minds, is it not necessary for victory over porn. I pray you are able to speak truth and correct lies. Look up my book reviews category if you haven’t already. Like MCAG, it shows how woefully inadequate conventional Christian wisdom is on this topic.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul B

        Even before I came across MCAG and your blog, the percentage of men using Porn and particularly the comparison between churched and unchurched bothered me. They’re are the same, if not a tiny bit worse. I couldn’t get rid of the feeling that we were missing something. Years ago I felt like God wanted me to call Christian men to godly manhood. Maybe this is part of his answer to prayers toward that end.

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      • Phil O.

        Really it’s a call to grow up. A mature purity is easily obtained when you stop believing the lies that you can only have one response. Sad that so many are stunted in their growth. It took me about ‘til middle age!

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      • Paul B

        For me, the saddest part is that my baby turned 21 in May. He freaks out if there’s even small gap in out bedroom door and he sees something. His mind is closed in this regard. But what hurts the most is that, for the most part, his response is something I’ve, with the best intentions, taught him.

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      • Phil O.

        Yes, I’ve had the same type of issue. I was very private. Now I’ll be “comfy” at home with no shame. It’s helped my teenaged boys with their own issues. Mrs. Phil will also go nude at home unashamed. It shows them what a real woman looks like. It’s been a positive all around. We sleep naked and have an open door except during times of intimacy.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Paul B
    Reply

    Thanks for the encouragement. I’ve always found people’s stories powerful. And mine, for that matter. When I was walking the black dog of depression, the decision to be completely open about my walk was the start of my healing. And have friends permission to be open about their own struggles.

    Liked by 2 people

      • Paul B

        I’m Toowoomba. Roughly an hour and a half away. I just want to be able to talk to someone who is a Christ follower and a naturist. In the US and UK, there are organisations and churches. I can’t find any here. I’ve been encouraged at how strongly evangelical and how deep the respect for scripture Il that I’ve seen in Christian naturists online. There are a few that are a bit weird, but they seem to be a tiny minority. As I said in my initial comment, I’m not a naturist, but my relationship with clothing has definitely changed in the past few months.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul B

        Didn’t know MeWe existed. I sent you a contact invite. As far as the group goes, I’m not Naturist. But I’m processing stuff which may lead me there eventually. I’m Christian first and foremost. Anything else comes after that.

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      • Paul B

        I’d joined MeWe and made contact, then I freaked out and deleted the account. When Porn was an issue for me there was the secrecy. It was something which I would, obviously, not want my wife to know about. Then there’d be the guilt and shame which would last until I told her. That was all I could think about after I’d joined. This was a place I was thinking of going without her express blessing. And there was a fear that it would end in voyeurism on my part. There is a big disconnect in my mind seeing photos of people I don’t know in the flesh. I still believe strongly that this is a conversation I need to be a part of. I’m just feeling like a total coward at the moment.

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      • jochanaan1

        That’s understandable, and commendable that you respect her this much.

        Have you studied the references in the Bible to “naked” and “nakedness”? You’ll find there is no general command against nudity, only a couple of very specific ordinances in Exodus from which we can’t draw any conclusions. And there are the examples of King Saul, King David, Isaiah, and Jesus Himself, who all were naked with God’s blessing in some public circumstances (very public in David’s case).

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul B

        I’ve studied it in depth. And I have found freedom from porn. I’ve understood commands against “exposing the nakedness” in Leviticus as being euphemism about having sex for as long as I have been reading the Bible. My grandmother encouraged my to, as well as verse by verse Bible study, to read the Bible through at least once a year. Regular big picture Bible Study, as I call it, has meant that almost all the scripture speaking about nakedness are obviously speaking about nakedness. It wasn’t until My Chains Are Gone pointed out the dualism of modern thought that I realised the implications of it.

        The event which challenged me was a recent camping trip with my wife. We were trying to stay at 1770 in central Queensland. The only town I’ve ever come across with numbers in it’s name. It was a last minute trip, do we were looking for a place to stay as we were driving. 1770 was booked out, but I found a place at Rules Beach. About 45 minutes south. It was cheap, had good reviews and firewood was supplied. After I’d booked, I discovered that there were 4 secluded sites in the bush at the back of the property which were for nudists. The walking track around the property has signs at a certain point which said “if you’re offended by nudity, don’t pass this point.” That messed with my head. I’ve long felt more comfortable unclothed. I wasn’t sure that the Bible actually condemned nudity. So my search began. The Anti-nudity position seem to all use proof texts to argue an already decided position. Some Christian Naturists seemed to be doing the same. But then I discovered My Chains are Gone, the Biblical Naturist, David Hatton, this blog, etc. Some seemed to have come to the naturist position while looking to prove the opposite.

        But then I have to do something about it. Being naked at home is only possible when I’m alone or my wife’s at home. My backyard is not private. I have only just realised how real the fear of my parents reaction would be if the found out about my thought process at the moment. One of the elders at my church has asked my to look into running an anti porn program which I now believe to be based on a false premise. He is a dear friend and I’m terrified of the conversation I will need to have. It’s the potential personal cost that is the wall I’m hitting at the moment. 53 years of being the good little preacher’s kid is hard to let go of

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      • jochanaan1

        I sense that now God doesn’t want “good preachers’ kids;” rather, scholars and spiritual warriors willing to speak His/Her truth in the face of churches seduced by mere political power and rules that “have indeed a shew of wisdom in will worship, and humility, and neglecting of the body; not in any honour to the satisfying of the flesh.” (Colossians 2:23)

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      • Paul B

        The body taboo has been around do long that churches don’t realise they’ve been seduced. “That’s the way it’s always been”. But not long ago, that was me. As to the preacher’s kid thing, I’m not sure what it is like in the US, but growing up in the 70s and 80s our job was to be the happy Christian family. Other preacher’s kids who I’ve spoken to all agree with that assessment. It means that no matter how much you believe in grace, your default is appearance management. Frequently I feel like I’m missing something. I had to look up Colossians 2:23 in the NIV. My only issue with the KJV is that it was translated in 1611 and English has changed since then. They tried to translate as word for word as possible which means that words like “naked” are translated as “naked” and not something less controversial. A cool aside, I heard a guy speak once who had a 1611 King James and the last Guttenberg Bible off the press.

        But I digress. The anti porn course the church wants me to start actually needs to look closely at Col 2:23. It’s a course I’ve facilitated. But it’s very much bouncing the eyes and trying to work out what leads to the slide into temptation. I was thinking I was getting close to finding that point. Not really. Then a few months ago I discovered that the Bible doesn’t teach what I thought it did and the temptation fell away in 2 days. Probably the time it took to get my head around it. Being naked stopped being sexual.

        The elder who wants to start the course is a guy who was way more trapped than I was and God dealt with him. He’s never been tempted since. He’s the first to admit that guys who are freed the way he was are a rarity. But now I’m wanted to start a course which I’ve come to the conclusion is based on a lie. I’m seriously afraid of the conversation. He’s a dear family friend. Before he retired, he was a bus driver like my wife. They worked together for a number of years. He and his wife helped my wife when she was struggling with stuff. Our friendship makes the potential conversation even harder. I’d appreciate a lot of prayer for boldness and wisdom. And for discernment as to when to have the conversation.

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      • Paul B

        If you get this in time, I’ll be having the conversation with the elder and 9.30 AM, local time) over a coffee. If you’re into time conversion we are UTC+10. I tried to catch him after church yesterday, but he had people coming for lunch and had to go.

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  8. At Ease
    Reply

    A prior post brings to light James 5:6 (NASB), “Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective [fn]prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.” Be encouraged by this truth.

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  9. BertlessOne
    Reply

    Mrs. Phil,
    When I read this:
    “…in those moments I evaluated who I was talking to and either out of fear, or with wisdom, made the decision to freeze or flee and redirect the path the conversation was on.”
    I recalled how the Holy Spirit led you to listen to Phil at the beginning of your journey. I believe this is more evidence of your being led by the Spirit.

    “The hope I have is found in Christ. It’s found in the love and sacrifice of giving His life for mine (and yours). It’s found in the miracle and majesty of an empty tomb. It’s found in the daily patience and forgiveness of a gracious Savior. It’s found in the hope and assurance of everlasting life when my time on earth is over. It’s found in the knowledge of Psalm 91:2-4, “Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”
    This is so meaningful to me that I intend to memorize it as a response to my own fears. I pray for you and Mr. Phil, that God will continue to use you and bless you, surrounding you with His peace.

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  10. Paul B
    Reply

    It went well. His face did a double take when I suggested the Bible doesn’t condemn nudity, but I’d already shared how my porn addiction evaporated as I read MCAG. It was a positive talk, with him sharing personal stuff from his past I feel privileged to be trusted with. I gave him the MCAG weblink and a challenge to read it with his Bible open. I’m going to be part of a discussion regarding the start of a more formal men’s ministry at church.

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